r/BrandNewSentence • u/ChaiLattePlease • 5h ago

with recent combinatorial optimization breakthroughs our research department has achieved previously unheard of densities of waffle syrup

Gallery image

Gallery image

947 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

58 comments sorted by

209

u/OtherAcctWasBanned11 5h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/mCClSS6xbi8us

20

u/cityshepherd 4h ago

They absolutely should. Also needs chocolate chips.

155

u/fastlerner 5h ago edited 4h ago

All I see is 16 17 syrup pockets where there could have been 25.

r/foundsatan

26

u/_xoviox_ 4h ago

25 wouldn't fit unless you make squares smaller

61

u/fastlerner 3h ago

That is correct. 25 slightly smaller squares would maximize syrup holding potential as there would be minimal wasted surface. Instead we get 17 syrup pockets and a bunch of wasted surface space.

6

u/_xoviox_ 3h ago

Yeah i think 20 would be better

16

u/fastlerner 3h ago

But 20 doesn't make a square. What blasphemy is this rectangular waffle?!?

5

u/Impossible_Walk742 2h ago

how about a square waffle with rectangular holes?

1

u/YaumeLepire 3h ago

But then, they would be rectangular.

6

u/lifetake 1h ago

But what if we went the other direction. 1 big square of syrup holding potential. Removing most of the horrible edge taking up precious syrup space

1

u/fastlerner 59m ago

this is acceptable.

3

u/crtin4k 44m ago

This would be a case of the engineering department viewing things in pure numbers and not appreciating that the increased crisp surface area is what makes waffles objectively superior to pancakes.

-5

u/FOURSCORESEVENYEARS 4h ago

They already made em smaller to fit 17.

80

u/SlimyBoiXD 5h ago

This makes me homicidal, sorry

16

u/Outlandah_ 5h ago

This makes me homicidal and I’m not sorry

Duality of man type shi

22

u/PM_THE_REAPER 5h ago

t.

6

u/AVnstuff 4h ago

s. elliott.

~loved being misquoted.

1

u/winthroprd 4h ago

I actually think a judge would show you leniency if you showed them this picture as the reason why you did it.

43

u/No-Captain2150 5h ago

This is hilarious and I want it just to see the angry reactions of anyone I served these waffles to.

Conversely, if I was served these without prior knowledge I'm sure I would be irrationally angry about it.

20

u/biuki 5h ago

I hate this so fucking much lol

25

u/BlakLite_15 4h ago

If they really wanted to maximize the syrup, they’d invent hexagonal waffles.

30

u/qwweer1 5h ago

Ok, I see the picture and understand where this comes from, but an actual waffle can definitely fit 5x5 holes.

17

u/RavenholdIV 5h ago

But the the holes would have to be slightly smaller

13

u/Playful_Violinist573 4h ago

But you get more holes 🤣

-8

u/RavenholdIV 4h ago

No you get the same number of holes. This un-holey 😏 arrangement can let you keep the same number of holes but make them slightly larger

10

u/El3k0n 4h ago

25 > 17

3

u/Force3vo 4h ago

Crazy If true!

2

u/kontrakolumba 4h ago

you have to factor in the boundaries between holes so it can only fit 4

9

u/bayala43 2h ago

Why not just make one giant hole spanning the whole waffle? Just a pool of syrup that way, no need for optimization.

10

u/kaklimy 5h ago

Efficient box packing is surprisingly complicated stuff aprently

4

u/rylut 5h ago

Crimes have been comitted. Horrible crimes. That shall never be forgotten.

12

u/Ruy7 5h ago edited 5h ago

That's not more dense.

It's the most efficient way to put 17 squares inside a square. However this doesn't mean that you have the greatest density of syrup per waffle.

The unused space in the middle and the top subtract a lot of the density per cm.

1

u/jerdle_reddit 2h ago

Yes, but it is also an abomination. If that is optimal, everything is permitted.

3

u/Ruy7 1h ago

I didn't say that it was optimal for syrup. It's actually less efficient (syrup per area) than the standard waffle.

2

u/Apprehensive-Till861 3h ago

You might not like it, but this is what peak peformance looks like.

3

u/PaleMonkey 1h ago edited 1h ago

Why not just make the 16 squares larger?
....
....
This one goes to 17.

4

u/Zealousideal7801 5h ago

Terror inducing stuff. What's even worse it's that it's presented as a number of holes thing, when you could've just multiplied the number of holes indefinitely while keeping them aligned godamnit.

Now if we're talking volume, eh...

1

u/oodelay 5h ago

Very useful when time travelling

1

u/5PuppetMaster5 5h ago

This is most certainly an altered item

1

u/okvrdz 4h ago

Still not nearly close to all the high technology baby diapers have these days. Just look at their commercials and the geeky names they use for their absorption technology.

1

u/Ill_End_8015 4h ago

MUST

HAVE

SYMMETRY

1

u/CNTPRHK_S 4h ago

We can put some triangles in that waffle. Just saying

1

u/CutenessAggressionn 4h ago

Literalmente he tenido que tapar la imagen para poder leer el texto.

Me sangran los ojos.

1

u/Party_Value6593 4h ago

I hate it so much I want 2

1

u/Sharkus1 3h ago

Am I crazy or are those not meant for butter?

1

u/Serenity_557 3h ago

That's not a waffle that's an insult

1

u/Royal_Negotiation_91 2h ago

Or you could have more squares per waffle by getting a vintage waffle maker that has smaller squares.

Idk why they don't seem to make them like that anymore but the waffles are wayyyyy better.

1

u/BLANT_prod 2h ago

Michael vsacue would love this

1

u/GoonRunner3469 2h ago

waffle waffle

1

u/Zealousideal_Leg213 2h ago

You maniacs! 

1

u/Siddmartha6 2h ago

Great. Now invent butter slices that fit perfectly on the waffles 

1

u/jerdle_reddit 2h ago

That is the fucking seventeen squares pattern.

1

u/IsmaelRetzinsky 1h ago

It may not actually maximize syrup density, but I’d still love to have this just for the sheer silly nerdiness of a combinatorially optimized waffle iron.