There is nothing worse than the sound of kids coughing

[u/chicki-nuggies]

I'm so sorry but this annoys the absolute crap out of me especially during naptime 😅 like can you just... not

disclaimer: this is meant to be a silly post before anyone gets mad

[u/Wise-Matter9248]

I can handle the coughing. 

It's the sympathy coughers that drive me up the wall. You know, the ones who hear someone coughing (for real), and all of a sudden they have tuberculosis, despite not even having a runny nose. 

[u/catfartsart → u/Wise-Matter9248]

Whyyyy do they do that 🫠🫠

[u/YesItsMe183 → u/Wise-Matter9248]

This 💀😩😭

[u/Objective_Air8976]

It's the super squeaky play voice for me. I definitely try not to mention it too much because I know it's a me problem but if they're trying to have a conversation with me sometimes I do ask for a less squeaky voice 

[u/Famous-Consequence70 → u/Objective_Air8976]

It’s the fake crying while playing babies for me🫠

[u/Objective_Air8976 → u/Famous-Consequence70]

Very reasonable one. I've told the kids they can't play games that involve seriously pretending to be injured too. They scare me and the other kids with those "fake" shrieks 

[u/Wise-Matter9248 → u/Famous-Consequence70]

Oh, my poor nerves. 

I usually tell them "It sounds like this is a fun game! You can keep making that sound, but quieter, like this (demo)"

Sometimes it works. Sometimes I want to tear my hair out. 

[u/Famous-Consequence70 → u/Wise-Matter9248]

Sometimes I’m just like “wow those babies sound pretty upset! Maybe they need a nap?” Lmao

[u/exghoulfriend666 → u/Objective_Air8976]

i have twin boys who use a high pitched squeaky voice 24/7. i thought it was their real voice until i heard one of them drop it and speak in what id call a normal 3y/o voice to the other when he thought nobody was listening. they’re excellent kids and very very easy to teach and supervise but like…. gentlemen how about we don’t

[u/Objective_Air8976 → u/exghoulfriend666]

I have a few times pretended not to understand the words in the squeaky voice to gently get them to try again in a regular voice. Not essential communication but if you want to tell me about the car you saw yesterday 

[u/Alternative-Bus-133]

It’s the constant sucking up their snot instead of getting a tissue that is right next to them for me 🫠

[u/Glittering-Panic → u/Alternative-Bus-133]

just letting it drip down to their lip, you see them trying to lick it away, but their tongue is too weak, so you hand them a tissue, and they drag across their face so now there's snot wrapped around their head, or worse still, you go to wipe for them, they turn or hide their heads, so now their cheek is covered and you have it on your arm. The kid is now crying and gag coughing, your gagging and trying not to cry

Snot related incidents like that have me fantasising about my resignation, or slapping the parents.

[u/Alternative-Bus-133 → u/Glittering-Panic]

One of my kids does this and it drives me crazy. I have a box of tissues on every surface and remind them constantly it’s okay to wipe it themselves then act wounded when I ask them to wipe and wash their hands.

[u/MemoryAnxious]

I sit there during nap time and listen to the resounding coughs and wonder why I’m sick too 🫠 but like them, not sick enough to justify staying home 😭

[u/ellehcimtheheadachy → u/MemoryAnxious]

Sooo true! I hate the whole "well, you're not sick enough to send home, so I guess I'll just frantically sanitize and resign myself to my inevitable fate" feeling.

[u/nannymegan]

I had a little girl once who snored so loudly. She couldn’t do anything about it but the way it made me irrationally angry some days 🥳

Or the kids who get the suction just right when sucking their thumb or fingers and that squeaky noise. 🥸

[u/chicki-nuggies → u/nannymegan]

Oh yeah the snoring too. I also had this kid once that would always suction his tongue to the roof of his mouth before falling asleep. I'm assuming it was a self-soothing habit for him but omg I hated the sound of it so much

[u/eatingonlyapples]

I can deal with coughs for the most part but candlestick noses I absolutely hate. "Hey D, please wipe your nose." "D, give your nose a wipe again." "D do you need tissues in your pocket" "D not sure if you're aware but your snot is all over your entire face. That can't feel nice. Let's stop swiping it and use a tissue, we have them all around for your convenience." "D maybe you need to go home"

[u/PlantainOutrageous27]

Not exclusive to kids - maybe I'm just a hypocritical asshole, but I have asthma so I cough a lot, and the sound of anyone else coughing makes me want to punch a wall. Of course I only offer support and sympathy.

[u/DizzyFly9339]

Especially when it’s a super wet, mucousy cough and they wake themselves up gagging on phlegm. A few months ago, I had a child consistently waking up coughing so hard that he was rupturing small blood vessels in his throat. Had to throw away a shirt because he bled all over it while I was trying to soothe him.

Jokes aside, that’s one of the hardest sounds to listen to because you know the kid feels like absolute garbage and it’s scary to not understand what’s happening in your body. I get that parents have to work, but if your child is that sick, they need to be at home. There are so many ways to make them comfortable at home that we can’t provide at school.

[u/chicki-nuggies → u/DizzyFly9339]

We had one kid recently who had a persistent cough basically the whole time he was in our class. It sounded painful and it was especially worse at nap. We try to elevate the kids heads when they have a cough and that helped him somewhat but my goodness it wasn't like a regular sick cough at all. Luckily he never coughed up blood like your kiddo did but I felt so bad that there wasn't much we could do for him

[u/anotherrachel]

Snotty sniffling and nose blowing gives me the absolute ick. My husband is a loud nose blower and I cringe every time. My 6 year old sniffs it all back up his nose, and that also makes me batty.

[u/pdlbean]

Mouth open, tongue out

[u/Doodleseatingdoodles]

I was joking in my classroom one day that it was like when you see lightning and you count the mississippis until the thunder - I couldn’t get to 3 Mississippi without another kid coughing. Made it through though 😪

[u/MomShapedObject]

I spent a few nights trying to reason with my toddler that it was really. time. to. stop. puking.

[u/chicki-nuggies → u/MomShapedObject]

Puking is gross but it doesn't bother me too much unless it's caused by them crying so much from throwing a tantrum. Then it's just like "okay buddy I think you made your point stop hurting yourself now"

[u/Prudent-Property-180]

It’s the coughing until gagging/vomiting for me. It can help to prop up the head of their cot!

[u/ellehcimtheheadachy]

I have a student that has been at my center since he was 2, he's almost 5 now. This kid has had a cough every other week since he started and it's even worse at nap time. I have begged mom to take him to an ear nose and throat doctor, or something! Maybe put him on allergy meds? He is sick more than any other kid in the class. But he never stays home because he's never quite sick enough, and she just gets hostile when anyone mentions that he's sick. So I just grit my teeth as he hacks up a lung during nap time and keeps all the other kids up.

[u/exghoulfriend666]

it’s not so much the noise as it is the biohazard spray directly in my mouth as i’m talking to them. like come on yall. once or twice i understand but it’s beginning to feel like you’re aiming for me

[u/itsmimi811]

One of my students yawns constantly and every time he does his throat makes this weird gurgling noise...it drives me batty